NOTE, I meant to post this a while ago, but never got to it, because well, the rest of the series never got written. Got it? Now ya do.
This post is the first in a series. I may have explained some of what I want to say in previous posts, either here or on other websites. This and subsequent posts will attempt to explain how the late Holy Father, John Paul II's, wonderful teaching called the Theology of the Body (TOB) relates and is applied to homosexuality.
I've been reading Christopher West's latest book, called <a href="http://www.christopherwest.com/at-the-heart-of-the-gospel-2/" target="_blank">At the Heart of the Gospel</a>. Even though I'm quite familiar with his work of teaching TOB over the past several years, believe or not, I've never actually read any of the books until now. I had the privilege to hear Christopher speak just a few weeks ago at a seminary. Admittedly, I went there not only because I'm a fan and I want to learn more, but I'd heard about how Christopher interacts with men who have unwanted same-sex attraction (ussa)...and I wanted to experience it first hand. Say what you will about me, but you know how some people will always say "I'll be the first to admit that I'm not perfect" or what have you... well I'm putting that out there right now. I'm broken! Yes, I heard that Christopher affirms us men in our search and struggle for masculinity... and I wonder, am I much different from those who merely wanted to touch the tassels of Jesus' garments in hopes of being healed and made whole. I don't believe my actions were selfish, but when I asked Christopher to signed my book, I simply told him, "I'm involved with a group called ____" (a ministry that helps those with ussa live according to God's will), and he know exactly want I was trying to say. Almost immediately Christopher sprang to his feet and wrapped his arms around me so tightly. Then he looked me square in the eye and encouraged me to keep fighting this battle, because it's the exact same battle that he and every other man on the face of this planet are called to fight. I think I cried a little.
As I reflect on that moment, I don't think it's because Christopher believed that I had daddy issues or that I wasn't hugged. He wasn't attempted to be a surrogate father figure. I think that Christopher genuinely tries to live his life by offering every single person he meets as much authentic love as he possibly can. He does his best, by the grace of God, to live his own life as Jesus did. Many times when I'm in deep prayer in front of the Blessed Sacrament, an image of God I'll have is simply Christ looking back at me as intensely with love as Christoper did, if not more so. This isn't just me making this stuff up just because I saw a guy who knows his theology once and attempted to get some of what he has. The scriptures clearly coincide with this vision of what heaven will be like: "for now we see dimly, as if in a mirror, but then face to face" (1 Cor 13:12) and even "blessed are the pure of heart, for they shall see God". (Mt 5:8) Christopher, in my opinion, lives heaven on earth, but not for himself. Far too often, when we think about heaven, we imagine how great it will be, yet for our own sake. I think that's a mistake. While we all hope to "go to heaven" when we die, I believe that it's precisely that attitude that prevents us from living it out now, and possibly hinders us from ever reaching it after death. Of course, that second part is just my speculation.
Heaven is NOT about me... because LOVE isn't about me. Heaven isn't just 'the greatest thing we could ever imagine, but better'. John Paul II, in Fides et ratio, claims that man is 'capax dei', the capacity of God. Setting the philosophy of the work aside (only because I haven't actually read the encyclical and some thoughts were confounding as I try to explain them to myself), I take that phrase to imply a certain power and thus responsibility we have to each other. My mom would always say "you can live hell on earth and your heaven on earth". She's right... but heaven is not about what makes us happy, at least not primarily. Because we has human beings can bring about heaven in the way that we treat each other and because heaven is our ultimate good, we have the responsibility to do so. At the same time, I do not write this in order to guilt you into the Christian vocation.
We should be Christians, authentic Catholics because we love, or rather, because Christ first loved us. When we act out of that love, we fulfill our responsibility without even trying, really... we fulfill the law that's been written on our hearts from the very beginning. When I think about how Christopher loved me and so many others in the midst of our brokenness, regardless of what the brokenness was, I have no doubt of his intentions. Christopher is a true Christ-bearer, just as his name suggests.
Okay, so I know that this post didn't get much into the specifics of homosexuality or the academics and pragmatics of TOB in relation to it, but I hope this serves as a starting point for discussion. My goal really is to apply this amazing teachings to one of the most controversial topics of our current generation and to see lives changed, including my own, because of it. I don't think there's been enough work done this specifically on it. Yes, Christopher West wrote a book and Janet Smith gave a talk (and I'm sure there's more, and by no means do I wish to belittle their work), but I'm discovering even right now a specific vocation... calling me deeper into prayer...
Pax Christi
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